What do you look for in a real friend? Someone to be there for you through thick and thin? Someone who is almost like your soul mate?

Before we get carried away with the notion of a friend, or what a real friend should be like, perhaps it is a good idea to get some insight from this wise quote:

“Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.”

Leave those sissy definitions of friendship to the girls. A real man needs real friends who possess the following traits – the basis of true friendship:

  • When you are sad, I will help you to get drunk and even help to plot revenge against that sorry bastard / bitch who made you sad.
  • When you are blue, I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
  • When you smile, I will know you are thinking of something that I would probably want to get involved in.
  • When you are scared, I will rag on you about it every chance I get until you’re not.
  • When you are worried, I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could get until you quit whining.
  • When you are confused, I will try to use only little words.
  • When you are sick, I will stay the hell away from you until you are well again. I don’t exactly want to catch whatever you have.
  • When you fall, I will laugh at your clumsy ass, but I’ll help you to get up because you are my friend.
  • When you are horny, I will want you to stay away from the hot chick I am dating but would gladly recommend you to her equally hot twin sister.
  • When you are really horny, I will buy you a Tenga sex toy from tengatango.com
  • When you are in trouble, I will bail you out of jail if you promise to return me the money immediately once you are out.

Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.

I usually don’t open up to people but I appreciate someone who is genuine and open-minded. Being positive is also very important as opposed to someone who is opinionated and stubborn or filled with fears and insecurities.

My ideal definition of friendship is that between John “J.D.” Dorian and Christopher Turk in Scrubs: always there for each other, watching out for each other, helping each other to be a better person.